The Fine Filmdrunkards Society

Chino: Baby Goose Down pillow *sigh* Hey girl, I’ll be your pillow AND your comforter.

Jack: You’d think they’d call it: Lars, the real boy.

Eibmoz: We should make a C-Tates one for Burnsy.

Burnsy: The C-Tates pillow goes between your legs and vibrates so your butt cheeks clap while you sleep.

Jack: I’m having a little trouble reading this. Can anyone tell me what the first ingredient is?

BK: WINE AND FROST

Will Smiff: Nick Nolte in a bumper car. You know what this implies about your argument.

Donk: What the fuck happened to Paul Hogan?

Chell: He has a 5 year old? Awwwww I bet he goes to some sweet ass tea parties.

Erswi: I don’t see what the big deal is. He’s seventy-one and his daughter is five. That means when she was conceived he was like sixty-sss…ewwww.

Donk: Nick Nolte’s sperm is so drunk that this girl was conceived from a load fired in 1989.

Mighty Fek'lar: Has anyone heard of watermelon/basil themed water?

Chino: I've heard of Toni Basil themed water. It's so fine it blows my mind.

Patty Boots: Somebody needs to make a bogan equivalent of Jersey Shore. I would watch that so hard.
Mighty Fek'lar: Define bogan.
Patty Boots: Australian white trash, basically.
Mighty Fek'lar: Terminology assimilated.
BK: Now I want a Vogon equivalent. "Are you DTF? Then please fill out all appropriate forms in triplicate."

Donk: There’s no such thing as a Mexican ghost. They’re excellent at crossing over to the other side.

Erswi: How gay am I that I just caught Top Gun on TV and I'm pissed I missed the volleyball scene?
Stinky Peet: On a scale of Tom Skerrit to Tom Cruise, you're Kelly McGillis.
Dirty Hairy: On the Travolta scale, you're 12 masseuses.
Luch: On a scale of hand-holding to shrimping, you're ATM.
Burnsy: You're gay. I'm not doing this right, am I?
Donk: On a scale of 'Highway to the Danger Zone' to 'Playing With the Boys', you're 'Take my Breath Away'.
Jacktion: Fraternal twins are often the result of non-sexual fertilization. The lack of sexual contact with you wife is what makes you gay, not some stupid movie.
Erswi: In this case fraternal twins were the result of... something something... BACK OFF I GET TONS OF SEX!!! GRRR... VAL KILMER IN A TOWEL!!!!

Chino: I pooped 3 times today.
Jacktion: So... a normal Poo-sday?
Chino: A Numbah Twos-Day.
Bex: Legend says that if you post that status on Terrence Howards facebook wall you'll get some free baby wipes in the mail.

Donk: I used to know that crazy Miami cannibal dude. He was a bulimic in the Army. We all called him "About Face."

GB: I knew him too...we met in jail after he was caught defacing someone's property.

BK: I bet you can make your own schedule in porn, right?

Eib: No, I think you have to come when they tell you to.